Episode 7

The Biopsy Prostate. Funny!

The Biospy

Charlie shares his crazy detailed funny story about him getting a prostate biopsy. It's a result of a previous bad prostate MRI where, well put it this way.. now a prostate biopsy. In the next episode, Charlie will share the results. So, stay tuned!

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The Biopsy


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Luz Michelle, Debbie Nigro Charlie Ponger

Charlie Ponger


Hey everyone, welcome to the official Seenagers. We're here today. I'm Charlie Ponger. I'm Debbie

Debbie Nigro:

I'm Debbie Nigro

Luz Michelle:

And I'm Luz Michelle,

Debbie Nigro


how are you guys better than you, Charlie live?

Charlie Ponger


I had a little impulsive buying today.

Debbie Nigro


Well, the reason yeah is more important than you had planned the reason because you're not sure if you're gonna live or die.

Charlie Ponger


I had a biopsy the other day of prostate biopsy,

Luz Michelle


always pleasant.

Charlie Ponger


Oh, my God, it's so barbaric. It's unbelievable. Oh, my God. So unbelievable.

Debbie Nigro


And we're going to ask him to tell the whole story. All right, I think we should start with the impulse buys because you're not sure if you're going to be around I've imposed by.

Charlie Ponger


So tomorrow I have to go into the office right and sitting around this morning to go


in and get the result the results through


the biopsy the MRI, the whole thing. And you know, they make you wait, right. And it's like they're not calling you over the phone. You have to go in. I don't think this would be a good sign. Well, I


don't I don't believe how long they're making you. Wait.

Luz Michelle:

I'd be on Google every day. I watch. I'm sure.


I did. I did a lot of Mr. Dr. Google


Image office getting the files out while he wasn't looking in.

Luz Michelle:

I'm so impatient to begin with, but


talk about anxiety. You know, the roof.

Luz Michelle:

So why did you impulsive?


Oh, I bought myself a brand new locker, say tea kettle


in case you don't make it.


Right? Blue, light powder blue. And


you don't make it I'd like to have that bequeath every time.


And then I bought myself a new French press coffee Pro. Nice.

Luz Michelle:

I'll take that. All right.


So so far, are you making tea and coffee? Three days. And we don't laugh. This is not going to be funny. I know. Right? Because it's very serious. When somebody says to you, you need a biopsy,

Luz Michelle:

but you gotta laugh. Everything runs through your head. You gotta laugh. We only laugh and


you only laugh when you're not seriously thinking about what's really going on. But you have to us, you know, look at me. I'm the queen of the sense of humor with the cancer of showing up at the Memorial Sloan Kettering. I go, Hey, I'm here for the modeling assignment. You know, you got


to deal with this. And the dark humor. I also think it saves us. I remember going for a second mammogram on something they thought they found. It's like you walking down the hallway and you see all the ribbons and the pink and you're like, oh my god, you know, like everything just runs through your head that be


unbelievable. So I get to the you know, I can't find the office because it's a new location. Guy. And I'm like, what? And I asked him the security guard. It's early in the morning. He sends me somewhere else. I go somewhere else. The people are standing in the backyard bullshitting with each other. Knock on the door. Excuse me? Oh, yeah. Hi. I'm looking for Dr. SO and SO. Oh, it's through those secret doors over there?

Luz Michelle:

She said secret? No,


I look like you know, it looked like it looked like I don't know, Mission Impossible kinds of doors. Right. So you go in there. And the nurse comes out. Now. Oh, let me just say the night before I was gonna help you were my friends. My friends, their take keeping my mind off it. They took me to Clemente days, clam house and Bryce. Unbelievable. And we drank our faces off. So I'm completely hung over. Right? Right. So I get in there. And I get into the room. You know, it's in the doctor's office, and you sit on this cold little thing. And you're like, Scott, you hung over and you take your pants and your underpants down,


grown man sitting on a cold thing hung over?


Talk about you know, and everything shrinking, right? Because it's so cold.


Yeah. And then you're like that even matters if this doesn't work.


And I look over to the right. And I see this condom.


Okay, over this thing. Yeah, let's test it.


And then she says to me, Well, how many drinks you have? And I said evidently not enough. You know, I looked at that thing.


And I'm like, Oh, this can't be happening. I'm in


much trouble now.

Luz Michelle:

What's gonna happen in the next moment? It was


unbelievable. And it's barbaric.


Okay, so let's not get into the gruesome details. But I got the gist here. All right. I'm just how can always Google just the


I felt like the guy put sand in the Vaseline. I'll just say okay,


of course you had to say

Luz Michelle:

the other 15 Anything you want. Yeah, we


kept we kept you from saying Yeah. So, this was extreme. It was extreme. And you had how many like needle biopsies so


so they give you 12 And I'm lying, and I'm lying on my side. And I'm like, trying to keep my mind off it because it literally feels like little little caps, you know, explosive caps. Gun. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah. And it's like it feel to my fingernails, you know? Do anything to like, give you some Novocaine. Okay, but that burns like there's no tomorrow, right? And you go through this thing.


This is bad story. This is a bad story. What were you thinking about while this is going?


Well, so it's so funny that you asked me that because the nurse said she was like the first the doctors go and relax. I'm like, relax. Are you kidding me? And then the nurse goes, think about your buddies. Last night. I go think about my buddies with this thing inside me. Want me to think about right? Can you even imagine? Go? I'm like, we're okay. There's no secret documents in there


now. So now they're diggin? Yeah.


So they give you 12 shots. There's 12 needles that go inside you. And they go through your colon into your prostate, right? It's very, very relaxing, and my heart. So now I'm like thinking, what am I going to? What am I going to do to keep my mind off this? So I start counting one, boom, boom, just like that. Two, boom, boom, three, and the guy the doctor goes, Are you counting? I go, yo, are you kidding me? And so I got to six. And then I forgot where I was like, Well, where are we? We're at eight. I'm like, okay. It was just


Sunday, you leave there and you get in your car. And you and you're like,


oh, so yeah, these are good questions. So the dot I asked the doc like, what's up, and he was like, come back in a week. I go come back in a week. That's it. There's no information whatsoever.


I figured there must be no will check on you or anything.


It's like very, you know, cotton doesn't matter of fact, cut and dry black and white. That's it done.


I think it's more than a week. You're waiting for the results. Yeah, it's


a little bit over a week. Yeah.


Where are they sending your your bio at your 12? I snapshot? Suam.


I don't know. You know what I mean? Yeah,


it was just bizarre. Mullah rootin. For you, Charlie. Well,


I mean, what do you what are you going to do? Right? If you have it, you?


Can me I've already been there twice. There's nothing. There's nothing more startling. Yeah. And having somebody say to you, you have cancer, right? Your blood drops out of your system. Your whole life flashes in front of your face. Yeah. And then you allow yourself and we'll tell you how to do this because you love yourself about 36 seconds of Oh, woe is me. This is why me why me? Why me and then you go boy, you slap yourself in the face. And you say get in, get through. And let's get on with this. Because there's enough science in the world. Enough great smart people out there doctors and nurses. They're gonna and medicine. They're gonna get you through. So whatever it is, yeah. Okay. We're with you. Yeah. And we love you. And could you just tell me where you're going? Where are you keeping that blue thing you just bought?

Luz Michelle:

Right. Uh, well, now,


I gotta write a will. I gotta make sure I do a video, you know, for when I'm toast.


There's actually a guy. Yeah, I think, who is encouraging eulogies while you're alive? I see. I love that. That's why you're alive so that you can hear how fabulous you are. Right. And everybody loves and everybody laughs

Luz Michelle:

and, you know, yeah, you know,


now, you know, I went to two weeks, since I've seen you. Yeah, one was an older woman who lived a great life. And it was just a beautiful send off. Although, you know, sad for her closest relatives, and one was very, very tragic and sad counterpart, woman who I could relate to who I was just heartbroken. Right. So we got to both wakes Dave and I and Dave is talking to his cousin who's about to have an operation for something else, like diverticulitis or something like everybody's having a bad time in operation, right. And instead of just saying, oh, good luck to you. You know, whatever. Dave says, oh, yeah, I knew somebody who just had that. That'd be they just dropped dead. Yeah. I looked at make it or something that was ridiculous. And then somebody else said something. He said, Oh, yeah, well, that's terrible. Because somebody I listened to me. I looked at his face. I said, you start to stop telling people when they tell you what their problem is. That somebody just died from it. Yeah. All right. Gotta Shut up and go, Oh, it's gonna be fine. Say those lying words. Okay. It's gonna be Charlie. It's gonna be fine. Yeah.

Luz Michelle:

Okay, Charlie, he's got to keep your sense of humor.


God comes up to me on Friday night, I think it was Friday night. And he goes, Oh, you're screwed. They're gonna, they're gonna take out your prostate. I'm like, that's what happens if they take that out. And then he goes, and then he goes, Well, and I go, Well, you got any advice for me? And he goes, No, you got to do your own research. I had mine removed 25 years ago on like, Okay, is that like neutering a guy? Yeah, basically is I mean, a lot of guys can't perform anymore, you know?


Yeah, we have another whole show.


I'm like, I'm seriously debating. I'm seriously debating. Alright, so let's just say you get five years and you can perform, or you get 20 years of zero performance. What do you do?


Well, that would be your choice.

Luz Michelle:

You just got to figure it out and go with the 20. You know, you got to get into different things.


I would take the 20 and stay hopeful you would Yeah, the whole world out there. You know why? Because maybe in 20 years, I'm gonna come up with the answer to that problem.


I'll take 20 Jack.


Yeah. Did you ever have a biopsy loose?

Luz Michelle:

I guess I've had some things done in my life. A good amount. I have a pretty thick envelope.


I got a lot done. But yeah, biopsy yeah, there's they're terrifying. It's terrifying memory. Mine done. On the way to the doctor, I smoked the joint, I got the biopsy done on the way home, I smoked the joint because I was like, you know.

Luz Michelle:

It was interesting, too. I remember like, when I was told I have to get a biopsy, right? Like, you know, talking to the doctor. And again, we want to make sure and so on and so on. And I was like, starting now, you know, like, starting now.


Now now,

Luz Michelle:

like if I leave and go out still, is that okay? We all show up to when we hear news that can rattle on Yeah,


it's so crazy. I had a biopsy before you know, the whole thing years ago, and I wrote a whole story about it. I called girls golf. Yeah, this is the hole in one you never saw coming. Girls golf. And you're like, why are you funny is going on here? Yeah. And don't they stay shoot little metal things in you to like, acknowledge where they took the biopsy from? I literally have no idea. You might have a whole like, you know, artillery of metal things in here. It's pretty rusty


afterward, you know, you you suffer for days?

Luz Michelle:

Sure. Let's take


one last question on this. And then we got to get off this PP topic? In your head? Yeah. And you left that office? Yeah. What have you been thinking about? And how have you been acting differently or not?


Uh, you know, there's a certain thing that like, I'm like, Alright, if this is it, right, I gotta go to Italy. I got to do this. I gotta do that list. The list, you do the bucket list, right? Other than that, uh, you don't even think about it. Like you think about it sometimes in the car, that sort of thing. But you're not really I'm not really thinking about it unless I go out and someone says something about it, or I get a phone call. Because you know, I'm an open book. And I've told everybody what's going on? Obviously, I'm doing it now. Right?


It's a deal to Italy, by the way, send you an airline deal in case you want to look into that. Alright, that's it for today. Everyone, we hope you're okay. Well, we'll let everybody know next time next time. Yeah.


Yeah. All right, everyone. Thank you so much for listening. We are the official teenagers share it? Well, yeah. Because we're growing. And by the way, we were number 60. Again, on the mod charts in real Yeah, because people are sharing the show.


That's so cool. It's just about finding some light in the dark man having some laughs in between whatever we is going on. We are seeing your teenagers that would that's what C major stands. Yeah. And we love being with you and having a few laughs together. Alright, that's it for today. Kids. Ready?

Luz Michelle:

See you. Bye.

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charlie ponger

Hey Everyone, The Official Seenagers is a comedy improv riffing podcast. Featuring self-deprecating storytelling and so much more!