Episode 31

Being A Seenager

Our cute Official Seenagers introduction and ending by Olive, a three-and-a-half-year-old, is really cute.

The Official Seenagers is at it again. Maybe Olive will be on our roster of correspondents? What do you think? Could you write us and let us know?

Tim Sabean of Howard Stern fame, a listener and a friend of Debbie Nigro's, sends us his 'You know you're a Seenager when' list.

Debbie and Charlie want to take a quick moment to thank you so much for taking the time out of your day and having fun with us!

Now in nearly every state in the country! So happy you enjoy The Official Seenagers, cause you know... It's Never Too Late!

Transcript

Being A Seenager

SUMMARY KEYWORDS

fun, leg, funny, people, passwords, new password, what are you thinking, car stereo, multitasker, Teenagers, Seenagers, crepe, thigh, magna carta, kidding, shot, turns, forgot, Debbie Nigro, Charlie Ponger, Tim Sabean, Howard Stern, next decade, Olive, laugh, happy, Mets, Yankees

SPEAKERS

Olive, Charlie Ponger & Debbie Nigro, Charlie Ponger, Debbie Nigro & Charlie Ponger, Debbie Charlie

Olive:

Hey Everyone, Welcome to the Official Seenagers

Olive:

harlie Ponger & Debbie Nigro:

Debbie, Charlie ponger How are you, Debbie? Niagra you're listening to the official teenagers. It's never too late. It's never too late to have some fun or get stung by a bee. All right, that was last episode. I'm good. I'm still here, which is a good thing, guys. So we love to laugh. And so I have this friend, his name is Tim Sabian. And he's a famous radio guy. Oh, he was the one who created the Howard Stern networks. Anyway, he sent me this list. He goes, Oh, this could be good for the teenagers. Yeah. Oh, nice to him. Well, the idea of the teenagers is picking up speed. Right. We took a shot. You had this idea? Yeah. We thought it was funny. I'm like, Okay, fine. Seeing your teenagers, right versus teenagers. And there's plenty of us out there. gone down anytime soon. And I see that we're getting some groundswell we have listeners in every state, almost every state in the United States. Wow.

ebbie Nigro & Charlie Ponger:

Look at our listeners. I'm like, Yeah, we're weighing heavy in New York and California. We need something in the middle. We need another state. We got we're heavy in Kentucky. We're heavy in Kentucky. Yeah. And South Carolina. Really? Yeah. Okay. They're all over the place. Yeah. They like bacon down there. Yeah.

ebbie Nigro & Charlie Ponger:

And I could do my own gardening and I could find bacon seeds. I'd absolutely absolutely. Get involved. We got a list of funny things that were on this list that Tim sent. We were just cracking up. It's so on the show. We're gonna gonna just gonna do the lines during the show, because it's just so darn funny. Yeah, like I'll do number one. You ready? I can relate to this. My doctor asked if anybody in my family suffered from mental illness? And I said, No, we all seem to enjoy.

Debbie Charlie:

It's so really

Charlie Ponger:

perfect.

Charlie Ponger:

Just once you want to use your name and password prompt to say that's close enough.

Charlie Ponger:

How great would that be? The

Debbie Charlie:

new thing is that they give you an opportunity to reset your password as many times as you want. Yeah. How you can't remember the last password you reset. Oh, every single time is brain stinging? Isn't it brains days?

Charlie Ponger:

It's horrific. It really is. I read now I have a book that's completely disorganized. With all my passwords in it. I never had to do that before. I just sort of did a standard password for everything. And now they're like, oh, no, oh, no,

Debbie Charlie:

you can't do that. They got a strong password and they got a weak, that's weak. So you start adding stuff. You're like, Okay, your middle, your middle. Okay, that's strong. Meanwhile, you have no idea what you just wrote. You. Get me in there. Yeah, there it is.

Charlie Ponger:

Right. And you know, and you're because you're so urgent about it. Because you're so frustrated. You don't take the time to open up a little pad and write it down a book, you need a book because if you lose a book, it's just, you know, you there is a thing on Google Chrome where you can actually save all your passwords,

Debbie Charlie:

but then somebody else could find them. Well, I use my right thigh. Because that's how I cheated on my my test in high school. That one time when I got caught I shouldn't have done that. I wrote like the Magna Carta on my thigh. Good to have a big guy when the test is about the Magna Carta, and it was a basketball game. And I had shorts and I forgot about that. I cheated. I never never I was a student. I just didn't study this particular night. Right. So I jumped for the for the shot or you're

Charlie Ponger:

playing basketball yesterday. You

Debbie Charlie:

had your basketball shorts on starting forward four years. Okay. Big shout out in the right 40 feet when the bomb went up in the I was like, Oh, there's the Magna Carta.

ebbie Nigro & Charlie Ponger:

On my other leg today. Yeah, it's crepe. Erase. What? Yeah, it's so funny. My birthday present. Yeah. From Dave. He gave me so many cute presents. And he's very funny. He insists when he comes in the room. Yeah, I fallen asleep first. That I am watching crepe. Erase infomercials. Oh, because they're always on and I go no, I'm not watching Craver. He's infomercial. They fell asleep during the news or whatever it was. He knows. I think you're lying. I'm not lying. So he from my birthday bought me crepe. Erase saying, my beautiful woman. I know you don't want to admit it. But you really want this stuff that you're dreaming about? Oh, no. So let me try it on one leg so I can see if it's different between this leg and this leg? Yeah, I'll let you know. Oh my gosh. You know, you know when you you know when you're talking about writing? You know the the answers on your thigh.

ebbie Nigro & Charlie Ponger:

I actually remember that. Oh, wow. You didn't get caught? Did you know I didn't but I don't feel happy telling you all that I cheated. Well, one time we skipped school. A going back in time. Well, I just want I wanted to just tell you, he reminded me this story. Okay. Well, I'm with Georgia. Pirna. Right. And a bunch of other people. And Georgia was sort of the leader of this little group. And she said Come on. We're going to New York City. We're gonna go to see Jefferson Starship. We go we skipped school. We go. We're on NBC. We all get snagged. Oh my god. It's like the day at the beach. I said I can't quit work. Oh, no, I think I was I was with a guy wasn't supposed to be with the Weather Channel.

Debbie Charlie:

Branching with the guy I wasn't supposed to be with. Alright, let's keep going good. These are fun little. You know,

Charlie Ponger:

being an adult is the dumbest thing I've ever done. That is so perfect for us, isn't it being seen agers I was

Debbie Charlie:

with my three year old granddaughter at the diner last week. I said, Honey, what do you want to be when you grow up? She goes an adult. You're a genius.

Charlie Ponger:

That's great genius.

Debbie Charlie:

All right, this is fun. I'm a multitasker. You are listen ignore and forget all at the same time. You can just like now I am not a multitasker here this is for you. Next one.

Charlie Ponger:

Oh, retirement list wake up. Do nothing I nailed it. Yeah. Yeah.

Debbie Charlie:

Okay guys, sometimes it takes me all day to get nothing Yeah, that's you know what I did? I did something

Charlie Ponger:

good This one's good. This one next one's you completely

Debbie Charlie:

I don't trip I do random gravity check. Yeah, use that one minute you're young and fun next you're turning down the car stereo to see see

Charlie Ponger:

better so many people do that. It's unbelievable.

Debbie Charlie:

hate against low when you're young and fun. Yeah. Blasting singing windows open party. Yeah, next year turning down the car stereo to see better. What is it that you can't see better? Well, the thing blast. There was

Charlie Ponger:

a guy that just said this thing to me. It was Jon Moxley. And he said, You know, I do that to see better because, you know, it's the senses and he starts giving me this Einstein explanation about why he does that. But I'm like, Yeah, I get all right. All right. You know,

Debbie Charlie:

I remember my daughter was in the car recently, we had a loud, you know, music. We're trying to remember being young. I said, turn that down. I can't see what I'm doing. And she's like, what's that have to do with anything? Everything has to do with everything.

Charlie Ponger:

I love I love this one. If you can think of the of the word, say I

Debbie Charlie:

forgot. My favorite. Right? He can't think of a word say I forgotten the English word for it. That way people think you're a bilingual instead of an idiot.

Charlie Ponger:

I'm going to use them. I can't wait.

Debbie Charlie:

Because I'm always going on you know? Yeah. Okay, this is me. I don't always go the extra mile. But when I do it's because I missed the zone out thing that happens when you're driving, you're thinking we all do it. And then you go just past like 16 exit and you know, you're in a trance. And I was just talking to somebody even

Charlie Ponger:

with the GPS on.

Debbie Charlie:

Right even GPS. That lady's got to go.

Charlie Ponger:

I changed mine to a British woman. You changed

Debbie Charlie:

it. Yeah. Yeah, really? Cuz this one's annoying. I want to smack her. I want to have road rage with my with my GPS girl.

Charlie Ponger:

Oh my god. You have road rage along?

Debbie Charlie:

Never know.

Charlie Ponger:

What about parking lot?

Debbie Charlie:

No, I'm not. I'm not. No, no, no, no, I have one problem. No, it's not true. I have one thing that snap crackle pops me what? When I'm at a red light. Yeah, it just turns green. Yeah, haven't taken my foot off the gas to put it brake to put on the guest yet, and somebody's holding their hand on the horn. Yeah, so I want to get out and like, bitch, but I have to control myself at once. Because you want to say something? Do you look

Charlie Ponger:

in the mirror to see who it is? Is it a male or female?

Debbie Charlie:

I don't really waste a lot of time on it. You have the same emotion every time like and I curse out loud. Come on, you know, give me You're kidding me. I would say You're kidding me.

Charlie Ponger:

Are you ever behind a car where you're like saying the same thing? Are you kidding me? Like they're not moving? Or any of that kind of stuff?

Debbie Charlie:

There's ways to beat people. Yeah, there's a little chaplet could you just move up a little bit? And then there's the Come on, we have the light. Let's go. We all gotta get moving. Then there's this dope which I don't think is very necessary as soon as the light turns. Alright, let's keep going. This is me. I don't mean to brag, but I finished my 14 day diet food supply in three hours and 20 minutes.

Charlie Ponger:

I happened it's weird being the same age as old people.

Debbie Charlie:

That's a good. Funny I like Yeah, I like it. Thank

Charlie Ponger:

you, Tim Sabian. Yeah,

Debbie Charlie:

wait a minute. I like this one. I may not be that funny, or athletic, or good looking. Or smart, or talented. I forgot where I was going with it.

Charlie Ponger:

It sounds like a song of beginning of a song. When I was a kid, I wanted to be older. It's not what I expected.

Debbie Charlie:

What do we think was gonna happen? Oh my god. Like, could you even believe some of the things that are happening that you in a million years can't believe you're doing now. Every life everything

Charlie Ponger:

is so just you know? Really? I mean, how many times do you say really? To myself

Debbie Charlie:

or to the world to both? I mean, I can't get past myself like I'll come Railay Debbie. Oh my

Charlie Ponger:

gosh, I walked into the bathroom yesterday. Very specifically okay to get something. I walked in and I went I have no idea why I'm here. None right. Went out and then ever heard about this syndrome? I think it has to do with the with the shots with the with the COVID shots. I think everybody everybody I'm talking to everyone from 40 UPS is my short term memory shot.

Debbie Charlie:

Now because the world has to reach everybody. Yes to everybody a very lot of pressure, the stress we have stressed.

Charlie Ponger:

Life is like a helicopter. I don't know how to operate a helicopter either. Yeah,

Debbie Charlie:

it's probably my age that tricks people into thinking I'm an adult. That's irrelevant.

Charlie Ponger:

Yeah, that's right. I love that one.

Debbie Charlie:

You don't Ma'am, I go. Yeah. All the man what man in the sir. got to be kidding. All right. Let's see what this one. Oh, this is fun, grow, never sing in the shower. Singing leads to dancing, dancing leads to slipping and slipping leads to paramedics and you're naked. So remember, don't sing in the shower. I love that. Well. I'm in the shower the other day and I'm washing my hair and then put the conditioner the

Charlie Ponger:

whole routine. Oh, you have a routine? Yeah. Yeah,

Debbie Charlie:

you gotta go in, get a quick get temperature right. Then you have to hurry up. Then there's you know face wash and then his hair wash and then you have to time the conditioner. So it stays there. Well, I'm shaving my legs because I don't want to waste extra time.

Charlie Ponger:

Oh, you do this whole you have a whole thing? To most women do this.

Debbie Charlie:

We have extra things to do besides you guys. So I don't know this. This conditioner was too much. And it was on the end. It was too slippery. And I'm thinking I just don't want to go down in the shower. This is not how I want to be found. Not right. Don't you think? That's terrible? Why no thought of having carrying you out by paramedics naked. That's not nice. Okay. Well. We all get heavier as we get older, because there's a lot more information in our heads. There you go. That's my story. Anyway, now I used to actually say this. You're gonna you're gonna go with that. No, I had to read it. I have high hair. It's not a blue font. That's extra storage. But my favorite is the last one. You can go no, go ahead. I want you to do it. I see people. My age. Yeah, mountain climbing. Yeah. And I feel good. Just getting my leg through my underwear without losing my balance. Somebody sent me that the other day. I started cracking up. And this morning I almost tipped over. You did? Yeah. Putting on the underwear. No swear I got the bad foot over here. Oh, yeah. I'm trying not to put pressure on it until I go to the doctor and see what's up with that.

Charlie Ponger:

Are you doing the one leg practice thing with 10 seconds closing your eyes, brushing your teeth, closing your eyes, all that sort of stuff?

Debbie Charlie:

No, but I I do test the waters every week, whether I'm going to die in the next decade because the science came out and said if you can't stand on one leg for 10 seconds. Each, you know, imbalance you're probably not going to make the next decade. I wonder if that's really a science chances. I like to believe Yeah, if I can stand there. Yeah, I will be here for the next decade. Yeah, right. Unless they fall over with the Undo. I'm gonna be here for a good way to go either.

Charlie Ponger:

At least three more decades. That's my goal now. Yo, yeah. Really? I want to see a bunch of stuff happen. That's you know, I mean, when we were little kids, we had the member Dick Tracy watches and now we have him. How many years ago was that? Don't say? But imagine what that's gonna be like in another 40 years. What's gonna go on? It's gonna be amazing. Amazing. Yeah, we'll probably be able to fly ourselves by ourselves

Debbie Charlie:

that I'm into. Yeah, I wanted to be a bird but you know the outfits

Debbie Charlie:

was gonna be a bird. I didn't have really good outfit. It'd be like a Cardinal. Or a blue J or something a little sparkly. Pepe, a bluebird Barbie. They never had a sparkly bird. I would have like, oh, like rhinestone.

Charlie Ponger:

It you're right out of central casting with a crash

Debbie Charlie:

because you know how those wings going up with all those sparkling rhinestones on That's so wrong. Anyway, that's it for today's show. Now we can see Whoa, we're going off a different direction. Yeah, having some laughs and fun hope we just took a little time may just smile a little bit. If you're one of us. We'd love to hear from you at the official screenagers.com Yeah, apparently can call us Charlie's takes the calls. Leave a message.

Charlie Ponger:

It's right on our website. It's right on our website. They can leave voicemails, they can sign up for email.

Debbie Charlie:

We still we still welcome CNAs your correspondents love to have everywhere in the country. Just anybody who wants to have some fun, your funniest friend if they're over 50 years old. We like having some commiseration on the show. We'll help you promote whatever you're promoting. Come on laugh talk about your business. We don't care as long as you're funny, okay? Or how like to have fun. That was the only two prerequisites.

Charlie Ponger:

All right everybody.

Olive Thank you for listening to The Official Seenagers

About the Podcast

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Official Seenagers
Never Too Late

About your host

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charlie ponger

Hey Everyone, The Official Seenagers is a comedy improv riffing podcast. Featuring self-deprecating storytelling and so much more!